Holiday at Ocean Grove

Remember a while back I said I wanted a holiday? Well I still do. Despite the fact that we did end up having one... sort of.

On July 5th, we took off to Ocean Grove for a week in a rented beach house. (I started writing this post the week after we got back, but it has taken a few 'sittings' to get it finished!)

The Plan...

Day 1: Pack the car the night before, leave home at 9.30 am and be at Werribee Zoo by 10.00 am. Leave the zoo by 2.00 pm and arrive at holiday house in Ocean Grove by 4.00 pm, with plenty of time to settle in before it got too late in the evening.

Days 2 - 7: Relax at the beach house, complete with extensive play equipment in the yard, toys, books and puzzles inside, so kids will require minimum adult-led entertainment. Mostly eat out, but use the fully-equiped kitchen for the occasional meal in. Play on the beach a bit, ride on the steam train at Queenscliffe, play mini-golf. Read lots of books. Gran and GrandPaul to join us for a few days so we can relax and do nothing much while they entertain the kids.

Day 8: Drive home after lunch, leaving early enough to avoid the worst of the traffic on the Ring Road. Arrive home with enough time to get some laundry done and to get organised for the rest of the week.

The Reality...

Day 1 (5 July): Leave home at 10.30 am. Stop off at Gran and GrandPaul's house (for the voucher to get into Werribee Zoo for half price which we had forgotten to take with us the previous day). Miss the freeway turn off to Werribee Zoo, detour through Werribee, arrive at the Zoo about 11.30 am.

Book onto the 12.30 pm safari tour then find that it is cancelled because the bus broke down. Wait for the 1.00 pm safari tour. Kill time by taking BallFiend on a walk to see some emus and brolgas while DeepSpice hangs out at the safari tour bus stop with Thumper. Get a call on my mobile from DeepSpice saying "get back here now! The bus is leaving in 1 minute". Pick up BallFiend and run flat out for about 90 seconds with him in my arms back to the bus stop. Enjoy the safari tour - highlights include a zebra pissing, a different zebra pissing and shitting,

an arthritic giraffe called Tony (RIP - he died about a week later), an ostrich frotteurising with our bus and a rhino pissing, and pissing, and pissing, and pissing... and pissing, and pissing... and pissing. Big animal, big bladder. Wander about the rest of the zoo - checking out the lions (well, lion - but it was really close up!), monkeys, wild dogs, cheetahs and hippos. Leave at about 3.00 pm.

Drive on to Ocean Grove. Muck up the navigation (stupid out of date Melways) and drive through Geelong instead of going on the brand new Geelong by-pass. Hit roadworks and get forced to take a detour halfway to Torquay before finally getting back on track towards Ocean Grove. Arrive at the beach house at about 6.00 pm. It's freezing - get the heaters on then make beds, prepare dinner (pasta bolognese, of course!) in the 'fully-equiped' kitchen that isn't, get over-tired hyperactive children ready for bed and finally sit down for a glass of wine before collapsing into bed ourselves.

Day 2 (6 July): Spend some time in the morning playing outside with BallFiend - trying out the enormous trampoline and playing croquet (borrowed from our local toy library) in the back yard of our beach house. Then out for brunch at The Dunes Cafe. BallFiend has a massive tantrum.

Short play at the beach. Wander around in the main shopping strip of Ocean Grove. Stock up at the supermarket and get some treats at the bakery. Home for dinner - another challenging night of cooking in a not-fully equiped kitchen - and an early night.

Day 3 (7 July): Gran and GrandPaul arrive at about 10 am. We go to a Maze and Mini Golf tourist attraction. Do the maze first, and stupidly take Thumper in the pram, so lots of carrying the pram up and down the stairs as we get more and more lost in the maze. Finally get back to the cafe for lunch and find out that all that is left is one sausage roll, one pie and a plate of scones, which we share between 4 adults and 2 kids. Play mini golf, much to BallFiend's delight. GrandPaul gets frustrated when BallFiend doesn't play by the rules, walks in the way of others trying to have their shot and generally behaves like a 3.8 year old. DeepSpice is too good at mini golf so we force him to play with a handicap - specifically, Thumper strapped onto his front in the Ergo baby carrier. She sleeps through most of the game.

Dinner at Ocean Grove hotel. We are the only people there when we arrive at 5.30 pm. When we leave at 7.00 pm, there are 2 other groups dining and a few at the bar. Guess we didn't need to book.

Day 4 (8 July): Queenscliffe. Steam train.

Lunch out with Gran, GrandPaul, Thumper and DeepSpice at The Apostle. Dinner out (just me and DeepSpice) at At The Heads while grandparents baby-sit. Thumper waits till we drive out the driveway, then screams non-stop until about 9.00 pm when she finally conks out. BallFiend sleeps on the couch while he waits for Thumper to settle in their shared room. Lucky for us, all was quiet when we got home but Gran and GrandPaul tell us that they spent most of the evening standing in the kitchen, drinking wine with a dim light on, so as not to disturb BallFiend who was attempting to sleep on the couch whilst Thumper settles in the bedroom! PS. our dinner at At The Heads was awful - badly cooked food and a noisy atmosphere with average service, despite charging $30+ for a main.

Day 5 (9 July): Gran and GrandPaul return to Melbourne. We go back for more Mini Golf at the competing tourist attraction across the road. This one is much, much better. We play the first 18 holes then go back for the second course - 36 holes in one afternoon! BallFiend starts to lose it at the end - gets tired and has a massive tantrum for the last 13 holes. Dinner at The Bark Hut restaurant - gastronomic highlight of the week! Highly recommended. Brilliant service - really welcoming of children, lovely food and cosy atmosphere, plus a short walk from our accommodation.

Day 6 (10 July): Drive to Torquay for the morning. Hot chocolates for morning tea. It's raining. Head to the beach. Rain has stopped for now. Get everyone out of the car, Thumper strapped onto DeepSpice in the Ergo again. Walk down to beach. BallFiend announces that he needs to do a poo. Get everyone back into the car and look for a toilet... and find one after driving only 100 m or so. DeepSpice takes BallFiend to toilet. BallFiend no longer needs to do a poo. Decide to walk to beach from where we have parked the car. Halfway there, BallFiend decides he does need to poo. Walk back to the toilets. BallFiend no longer needs to do a poo. Give up on trying to get to the beach. Set up a picnic beside the river, under ominous grey clouds and hope that the rain holds off. It does until we finish eating.

Return to car and drive back towards the holiday house (with BallFiend complaining bitterly about not having gone to the beach). Stop off at a different beach access, closer to Barwon Heads. Open the back of the car to get out coats and hats. A wind gust reaches into the car and snatches BallFiend's beach ball (that cost $2.00 from Coles). We watch the beach ball disappear over the cliff and presumably out to sea. BallFiend dissolves into tears. We start our descent down the cliff-side stairs to the beach. DeepSpice goes on ahead and, amazingly, retrieves the beach ball. We spend about half an hour pottering around looking in rock pools, while BallFiend moans about not wanting to go to the beach and wanting to go home.

Finally we decide to go home. BallFiend commences moaning about not wanting to go home and wanting to stay at the beach. Sigh.

Go out for dinner at Bolzano Cucina, an Italian restaurant in Ocean Grove's main drag. BallFiend takes an interest in the specials board, a blackboard hanging on the wall, and in the process of trying to look behind it, knocks it off the wall and nearly knocks himself out. Dinner finished by 7.00 pm, back home and kids in bed by 8.00 pm.

Day 7 (11 July): DeepSpice takes BallFiend to the Ocean Grove beach. Make a sand-mermaid.

Thumper and I meet them at about midday for lunch at the Dune Cafe. Return to the beach after lunch. Obviously suffering from sun-stroke (I know it is Winter, but he is a red-head), DeepSpice accompanies BallFiend into the water for a paddle!

Thumper and I play in the sand. She enjoys knocking over sand castles, tipping sand off the spade but most just eating the sand.

Go home late afternoon, make dinner, get kids into bed, then start packing ready for our departure tomorrow.

Day 8 (12 July): Spend all morning cleaning, washing sheets (and madly trying to get them dry in a dryer that wasn't cooperating), packing the car and simultaneously entertaining the kids. Depart about 11.30 am. Buy pies for lunch at the bakery which says "the best pies in the world" or something similar on the shop window. Take pies, and children, to a near by playground.

Eat pies. Discover they are not even close to the best in the world. Pack everyone back into the car and drive home. Unpack car, unpack bags, start on the laundry, preparing dinner, etc. etc. etc. Realise I feel more tired than when we left and that if it wasn't for the photos and the credit card debt, I wouldn't believe we'd even been on holidays.

I still want a holiday, but the holiday I want is a holiday from the responsibilities for caring for children, something I'm not going to get for quite a few years yet. Sigh.

--