My old bomb

Truth be told, our car is a bit of an old bomb. It's a 20 year old Toyota Camry wagon that we bought it in 2000 for about $8,000, after trading in DeepSpice's bright blue Mitsubishi van (which was even more of a bomb). At the time the Camry was in reasonable condition, with about 165,000 km on the clock. Now it has done close to 200,000 km. Even though the body is rusting, the suspension is crap, the upholstery is a bit grotty and generally, the car is old and tired-looking, I am generally very happy with it. It has a has very reliable engine and we get it serviced regularly to keep it that way. Our mechanic reckons it will run until at least 300,000 km, no worries!

It is due for service in September, around the time Thumper is due and DeepSpice and I have been deliberating about whether to get it serviced early... just to be sure that it is going to get us to the hospital when I go into labour. But of course, each week that we get closer to the due date, I get more and more reluctant to be without a car, even for a day. What if I go into labour early and the car is off getting serviced?!

Anyway, the decision was made for us on Wednesday...

I had just been to an appointment with the midwife on Wednesday afternoon, then I drove straight to creche to collect BallFiend. He has had a big week: on Sunday he got to hang out at home with DeepSpice while I went off to my baby shower; on Monday he had a playdate with MasterW (and his little sister LittleMissIz) while I went to a physio appointment, then he was dropped off to Gran and GrandPaul at about 1.00 pm for a 2-night stay (more preparation for when Thumper arrives). On Wednesday morning, BallFiend was dropped off at creche by Gran and GrandPaul (apparently to much protesting). So, I was eager to see my little BallFiend, and was pleased to get to the creche by 4.00 pm.

Then disaster struck!

I parked in the creche carpark, got out of the car and then noticed what looked like smoke coming out from under the bonnet. I backed away slowly from the car wondering what the hell I should do. The car was parked right next to the creche playground and if it was about to catch fire, kids would need to be evacuated out of the playground urgently.

An electrician drove into the carpark in his van and I asked him for help. He quickly established that my car wasn't about to burst into flames and that the smoke was actually steam. The radiator hose had got a hole in it and was spraying hot water under high pressure everywhere inside the engine cavity. The sparky put a rag over the leak to protect the alternator (fortunately I happened to have a rag in the car - either a sign that I really am a 'mum' now, or perhaps it is just a hang-over from my 'be-prepared' my days as a brownie and guide!). I waddled as fast as I could into the creche and phoned the RACV.

It was now about 4.15 pm and RACV said "a mechanic should be there in the next 20 - 40 mins". They took my mobile number and said they would text if there was a delay. Then I called DeepSpice and asked him to leave work ASAP to meet me at creche - if I was going to be walking home with a worn out nearly three-year old, I was going to need some help! Then I finally was able to say a proper hello to BallFiend, who gave the impression that he hadn't missed me at all for the past 2 days and was more interested in trying to throw his hat onto the roof.

About 30 minutes later (around 5.00 pm), I got a text advising that the mechanic would be another 80 minutes! So I rang back and gave the I'm-a-pregnant-woman-accompanied-by-a-small-child sob story. They said they would see what they could do.

DeepSpice arrived and a few minutes later another mum (who I know through our playgroup) arrived to collect her daughter. She offered me a lift home which I eagerly accepted! DeepSpice transferred BallFiend's car restraint into her car and we were home around 5.45 pm. Poor DeepSpice got to hang out in the carpark waiting for the RACV. Seems that my pregnant-woman plea worked though, as they came before 6.00 pm and DeepSpice arrived home with our car in a (temporarily) drivable condition around 6.10 pm. He was escorted by the RACV mechanic who said it was possible that the head gasket might be cracked due to engine overheating from the leaking radiator hose, and that if the car's temperature gauge rose suddenly to pull over immediately.

On Thursday morning, DeepSpice took the car to our regular mechanic to get a proper repair done on the radiator hose and luckily the mechanic could fit us in for a service at the same time. Our dear old bomb gave another sign that it is aging... on the drive there, the handle to adjust the wing-mirror broke! (At least it didn't wait until after we got it back from the mechanic!) Anyway, our mechanic fixed the radiator hose, serviced the car, said the head gasket seems fine and replaced the broken wing-mirror handle. The bill came to $345.00 (with $45 for the wing-mirror handle).

Not too bad... considering that VolubleK just had to get a computer chip in her Volvo replaced and it cost her over $800! And that is why I love my old bomb!
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salmon

No I don't want any! I don't want any salmon!
I-don't-want-any-Salmon-can-I-have-some?

BallFiend watching DeepSpice open a packet of smoked salmon for dinner. (He then sat down and ate the salmon).
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Pregnancy update: 33+2

Nearing the end now... just over 6 weeks to go! I finish up at work at the end of this week and I can't wait!!

Measurements at 33 weeks pregnant:

• Waist: 119 cm (was 114 cm at 29 weeks)
• Hips: 102 cm (not sure why, but this is 1 cm less than at 29 weeks... weird!)
• Weight gain: 10 kg (in truth, some of it is probably due to the chocolate teddy bear biscuits I have become addicted to!)
  

The bump is big, big, big! Though thankfully has dropped down lower, so I can breathe OK most of the time. Unfortunately it also means that Thumper is lodged right down low in my pelvis (a good position in preparation for birth but bloody uncomfortable for day-to-day living). I can't bend to tie my shoelaces. My abdominal muscles seem have abdicated so I have pathetically low core strength. Took me about 15 mins to push the trolley across the car park when I left the supermarket today! Basically, everything is a great effort - especially getting up from sitting, squatting or kneeling on the floor (something I seem to do quite often due to BallFiend being only 92 cm tall).

Current aches and pains:

• Still have the deep muscle soreness in my right gluteal muscle.
• Sacroiliac joint still aches.
  
• Still get the stabbing muscle pain, like a stitch on the lower right side of my belly, if I walk for more than about 5 minutes.
  
• Also get out of breath quite quickly, even after only mild exhertion.
  
• Ribs sometimes sore around the back, presumably due to being flared out to accommodate Thumper.
  
• Have had a few cramps in my feet.
• Kicks, prods and other movements by Thumper cause sudden, and sometimes painful, twinges at times.
  

I saw a physiotherapist today (after waiting for 2 weeks for an appointment!). Had some massage and got some stretches to do, plus some other tips on managing the pains:

• use a heat pack on sore muscles;
• walk on smooth, soft surfaces eg. grass rather than the footpath;
• use a lumbar support cushion when sitting;
• minimise walking;
• do stretches daily (in particular, on hands and knees do the 'cat' stretch (arching back) and a 'hip-to-shoulder' sideways stretch);
• when standing, shift my weight to the centre of my foot (rather than having it forward on the ball of my foot) as this activates the core muscles and will help take the load off my sacrum;
  
• could try water therapy - eg. walking in a pool;
• keep knees together (or as I put it to her 'be more lady-like'). Eg. swivel with knees together when getting into or out of a car;
• Sleep on left side with a pillow between my knees (I already do!);
• Wearing low-heeled, soft-soled shoes, eg. runners.
  

Nocturnal interruptions

• On a bad night, I wake approximately every hour. There is no comfortable position anymore. Mainly I lie on my left side because of my sore back, bum and leg. But eventually the pressure on my left hip gets too much and so I have to wake up to turn over (as this requires a major readjustment of pillows between my legs). Then I lie on my right side until my sore muscles complain and I turn back to my left side again.
• On a good night, I sleep for 8 hours straight (this is usually following 5 bad nights in a row, when I get to the point of sheer exhaustion, so nothing will wake me, however achy I am!)
  
• One to two toilet breaks on a typical night (usually around 1.30 am and 5.30 am).
• Occasional early breakfast at 4.30 am.
  
• BallFiend still sleeping well (7.30 pm until 7.30 am).
  

The tenant (Thumper):

• Is head down, ready for the big day (at least this according to the midwives and obstetrician, who have examined me at the past couple of visits).
  
• Doesn't really kick or thump so much anymore. More inclined to make lots of large movements, full body turns or lots of little squirmy, tickling movements, and these are often really, really low down in my pelvis.
  
• Still get the occasional thump though, but I guess it is getting pretty squashy in there.
  

Fitness regime

• Continue to do Yoga class each Saturday. No longer accompanied by The Librarian, who brought LittleMissF into the world on July 7 (a week early).
  
• Walking is pretty much out, on advice of the obstetrician and physiotherapist - apparently my aching pelvic area is showing signs of pelvic instability, so I have been advised to keep walking to a minimum.
• Lying on my side on the couch during the day! (Resting is good for the body too!)
  

General Health

• Diet continues to be 'reasonable' - at least some fresh fruit and vegies daily, but well-balanced with chocolate and other sugary delights.
  
• So far, still free of Swine flu. Apparently the epidemic has peaked in Victoria now. Although advice to pregnant women is stronger - ie. wear a mask, avoid crowds, etc. Still taking Vitamin C daily.
  
• Sore throat persists - a background annoyance, but not the worst thing in the world. Doctor has done some tests (which I still haven't got the results for!).

Birth/Baby preparation

• Currently reading Birth Skills by Juju Sundin (highly recommended to me by several people).
  
• Have done two of three Hypnobirthing classes and finished reading Hypnobirthing: the Mongan Method prior to the first class.
• Practicing hypnosis techniques a little bit most days. (Approximately 3 nights a week DeepSpice and I do a session together, the rest of the time are exercises I do alone.)
  
• Still remembering to do pelvic floor exercises most days.
  
• Picked up the sofabed a few weeks ago... ready for DeepSpice on those nights when he needs to sleep away from a screaming infant.
  
• Occasional and usually incidental discussions with BallFiend about what it will be like when Thumper is born. Trying not to make to big a deal about it and at the same time, make the most of opportunities as they arise. Eg. if another mum is breastfeeding her baby, I will point it out to BallFiend; we talk about what babies do (not much but cry, sleep and poo) and I have told him that DeepSpice and I will be very tired when Thumper is born. Also been making the point that once Thumper comes to live in our house, it will be for good. So many others have told me that the older sibling loves the new baby for about 2 weeks, but then gets really peeved when they find out the arrangement is permanent!
  
• Maternity leave sorted out - I am taking 12 months plus another 6 months long service. Handover at work pretty much complete - just a couple of tasks still to finish off. But mostly the last two days at work are catching up with people to say goodbye.
  
• Nesting... still no signs. But have been trying to get those last few home renovation essential projects done: DeepSpice has been nagged into draught-proofing of windows (a couple still to go); I have had quotes for external awnings, internal blinds and a security door for the front door (still trying to finalise which company to use though); have done more decluttering with a successful eBay auction completed last Thursday; Tilers are booked for next week to finish fixing up the fireplace in the backroom. Still, the 'to do' list has plenty more left on it, and no end in sight! I will give up shortly, I'm sure.
  

Overall...

It is really hard to 'enjoy' this pregnancy compared to my first one. The aches and pains have been worse, from much earlier on, and there is no rest time with BallFiend already in my life. More often than not, I find myself thinking "What have I done!! What possessed me to want a second baby?". I am dreading the thought of all-night sleep deprivation that comes with a newborn, and I can't comprehend how I am going to give any time to BallFiend or DeepSpice. Worst of all, with BallFiend being nearly three years old, our life is just starting to feel really 'normal' again - we are getting back some time to ourselves (mainly in the evenings, but also because BallFiend is now old enough to be more easily baby-sat by others). When Thumper arrives, so will the chaos and no doubt it will be another three years before we get back to this stage where life is more managable again. On the positive side, I am still looking forward to having a tiny baby to cuddle, feed and adore again; that and 18 months away from paid work!

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no time for carrot

I'm sorry but I don't have time for carrot at the moment.

BallFiend, at dinner refusing to eat his vegies but insisting that he should be allowed to eat a slice of bread with 'free-nut butter' instead.
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A special moment

Last night, CutLuce came over to look after BallFiend as DeepSpice and I were going out to a HypnoBirthing class. While I was getting BallFiend into his pyjamas, CutLuce was quizzing him about who his best friend is...

CutLuce: "Is LittleMissL your best friend?"
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: "Is LittleMissP your best friend?"
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: "Is MasterW your best friend?"
BallFiend: "No."
Me: "Is S. (at creche) your best friend?
BallFiend: "No."
Me: "What about L. (at creche)? Is he your best friend?
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: Is DesignerSis your best friend?
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: Is DesignerMonkey your best friend?
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: Is Wigward your best friend?
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: Am I your best friend?
BallFiend: "No."
CutLuce: So who is your best friend?
BallFiend: "Mum."

My heart melted!

When I set out on this parenting journey, nearly three years ago now, I never had the slightest comprehension that my child would one day describe me as his best friend! Whilst I do remember reading ages ago that a young baby sees their mother (or primary carer) as their main friend and playmate (and not just as a carer and provider), I had sort of forgotten this. I suppose I assumed that because BallFiend is older now, and more independent in his play, this does not really apply anymore.

But in that instant, when BallFiend named me as his best friend, I gained a whole new insight into how he views me and our relationship. To me, he is my son and I understand our relationship as being primarily about responsibility - ie. mine! I need to love him, raise him well, care for him physically and emotionally, guide him through life and help him learn and develop... and ultimately ensure that he grows into a healthy, happy, independent adult. Each day is 'work' that I need to do towards this end (and usually with many challenges to be negotiated in doing so): serving meals, changing nappies, brushing teeth, reading stories, playing with toys, talking about the world and all the things in it, providing (positive) discipline, and settling for naps/sleep, etc.

In that one special moment, BallFiend made me realise that despite the number of times a day that I...

• grow bored with re-reading him the same story,
• get fed up with 'helping' (ie. instructing/coaching) him pick up balls to return to the ballpit,
  
• become impatient while waiting for him to finish a meal or get dressed;
  
• put my needs and wants ahead of his, or
  
• lose my temper,

I must still be doing something right!
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CAPS LOCK TRAINER KEY

DOES SOMEONE YOU KNOW HAVE A SHOUTING PROBLEM?

Fix that CAPS LOCK key forever!
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